Honor Your Own Rhythm

The most advanced student in yoga class is often the one listening to their body and taking child's pose. While it's easy to spot the new students by their ego driven practice of "going for it" in every pose, honoring your body and your own rhythm is a sign of an advanced yogi. Same goes off the mat and into your life. Honor your own rhythm in everything you do.  ---FB Status from my friend (and first yoga instructor), Kimberly

Warrior 2 in the sun.

She is so right. I have been that student who completely went for it. In fact when I started almost 6 years ago, I too treated yoga like a work out class. I wanted to do it all, and do it great. Only I found out quite quickly my body wasn't wired for practicing yoga that way. Going for it was not my answer, slowing it down and honoring my own body's limitations was. I'm not flexible. I am one tight muscled chick. I am my father's daughter.

So I was completely surprised when last Christmas my dad pulled me aside to show me a book he had recently purchased at the library's used book sale. It was called Real Men Do Yoga. I laughed at first, because my dad is a true work out kind of guy. Exactly like I used to be. He never slows down enough to stretch, let alone to contemplate a yoga class or the slowness of a yoga pose. But there he was giddy with excitement about a book with a section showing yoga poses that would help improve his golf game. Well, really it showed poses that would help him improve his flexibility, but what pulled him in was the idea that he might be able to do something about his golf game. Despite having retired several years ago, with more free time to work on his golf game, his game has actually gotten worse.

Triangle on a picnic table.

He is tight muscled, goal oriented, and in phenomenal shape for his age, but he's not very flexible. He has a body like mine, long legged, long armed, and complete with a very short torso. That may not sound like a detriment, but at times it is. For example, in a golf swing you need to be loose and free flowing. Us tight muscled peeps with short torsos have a hard time loosening  up through our middle sections. It has taken me years to even begin to do a cobra properly. There is no flex in my middle.

So as he excitedly showed me the pages of his new book, it dawned on me that yoga really can be for everyone, even if you discover it late in life. Even though I am often saying it at the beginning of my yoga classes, I realized that I truly believe it. Young, old, weak, strong, flexible, tight muscled, whatever your body type, Yoga really is for everyone. And good instructors should not tell you that you should be able to go further, or kick your prop away and tell you that you don't need it, or put their hands on you to push you further into a pose. It just isn't right.

Plank on the beach.

Listen to what your body tells you. Yoga should not hurt. If something does, stop doing it and be sure to ask questions of your instructor later. Maybe they can help identify a slight modification that will help the pose feel better, or suggest an alternative. I'm certain that if they don't know the answer off the top of their head, they will get you an answer. Because good yoga instructors care about their students. And if any of them are like me, really curious by nature, we enjoy investigating and will use every question as an opportunity to learn something new to help the next student.

While the physical characteristics I inherited from my father may limit my ability to demonstrate a pose to its fullest extent, I can always make sure to demonstrate my fullest ability to do a pose (and talk my students through what it should really look like with my words.) Do what I say, not what I do. Take my very wise friend Kimberly's advice and be one of those advanced yogis in class, the one's who listen to, and heed, their own bodies.

I believe it will take you far in life, on the mat and off.

Namaste.

I Painted My Toes Green...

...because I am happy. 

I have a new job and I am so excited for what is to come.

To the naysayers who question my sanity about changing career directions in this economy, and at my age, to sell digital printing, direct mail and wide format ink jet printing, I say this: I am 100% confident in my decision. I am happy. I am excited. I am ready.

I say this with total confidence, because now that the decision is made, I can fully breathe. And it feels so good. I took my own advice. Nearly two weeks ago while we were breathing at the beginning of class, I suggested that my yoga students let something go.  On their next exhale I encouraged them to exhale something away, allowing room for something good to come in.

It totally worked. I did indeed let something go that night, something that was super hard to let go of. I let go of who I was, who I had spent almost 24 years of my life being. I let go of how I had come to define myself and the very next day I had the most positive day ever! Seemingly out of the blue, I found my new place, my new direction.

I'll share with you why I know I am headed in the right direction. This is the message I received the day after my initial meeting with my new employers:

"This is one of those rare situations in which we really don’t need to have more discussions or meetings to ruminate upon the right decision. We think that the stars have aligned properly and that you would be a fantastic addition to our unique crew here and we would be honored to have you out there in the world representing our business. "

You see, sometimes even though the path is not clear to us, it all makes sense from a higher power. My stars have aligned, my dots have connected, and I am happy.

And more importantly I have faith that this is the spot I was meant to get to, the place I am supposed to be, right now, at this moment.

And see, my toes are indeed, green.

Hello Terri, Welcome Back

Credit: Google Images

Okay, so I had the best day yesterday. It felt so good. I even broke a rule and texted while at a stoplight just to share it with some peeps who needed to hear something positive come out of my mouth. (Do not tell my kids about the texting part).

It started off a rainy Thursday, one of those where it is easy to give in to the grey. But, in honor of my number two New Year's Resolution, I chose to look at the positive: my car is getting a badly needed car wash in January for free from all this rain.

And then it happened. The snowball effect of positive thinking. One thing after another.

First, I got an unexpected phone call with some good news. Good way to start the day off on the right foot.

Then, I left a really great meeting (that ran longer than I anticipated, and since I had failed to fuel the parking meter properly) expected to find a ticket! There was no ticket on my car. And 3/4 through that meeting I found out that the super cool new person I was meeting with, actually knew me. I had once been her yoga instructor. Talk about a small world.

At the next stop the meter I chose to park at had time left on it. Bonus.

I got a phone call. Sadie was downtown in the rain and needed a ride. I was one block over. I hadn't seen her in what seemed like days. So ten minutes in the car with her was an unexpected gift.

I stopped for McDonald's-- my go to cheap food stop ---and the drive thru handed me the freshest fries I have ever gotten from McDonald's. And believe me, I have eaten more than my fair share (I even used to work there).

Later, I went to another great and positive meeting and left it filled with possibilities. I felt fantastic.

I smiled at everyone I encountered as I did my weekly grocery shopping (during the big Snowmageddon after work rush) and not only did the grocery store clerks all smile back at me, they chatted and genuinely wished me a great evening.

An email from a friend came in, with contact information for someone who might be willing to help me work out the blog design for my new blogs, and maybe even do it in trade. What a plus to think I might actually be able to move my ideas forward for a change. Relief.

Then came the news that Sadie got another job. No call backs, no-let-us think about its, she was hired on the spot after they passed up four others who interviewed before her. She was just what they were looking for. Awesome news.

And all this was followed by dinner (home cooked and complete with wine) at a totally awesome new friend's house. A treat for me she said...just because, who else takes care of momma? And she made tofu lettuce wraps. Did I mention I have never knowingly eaten tofu before? I loved them.

Happenstance...or just positivity? I guess a person can't know for sure, but I'm now a believer that the vibe you give off to the world, comes right back at you. 

Hello, Terri. It's nice to have you back.

A Blast From The Past

Ever encounter a blast from your past that you then discover is totally relevant for your future? I have.

Yesterday I was digging through some old paper files and I ran across my "Candidate's Page" from college. Ever heard of that? Although I'm sure it is not required anymore, it was necessary to complete one before you could graduate from college. The instructions at the top of the page say it should be a short story of your life, listing your family background, your precollege education, personal achievements, leadership abilities, and work experiences. It should be typewritten and in narrative form, and is limited to one page.

As I read my words from so long ago, I immediately noticed three things. 1). I wasn't a half bad writer. 2). I was pretty focused as a kid. 3). Oh, how things have changed. Back then social security numbers were also your student id numbers, and mine is right on the bottom of the page for all to see (steal).

As I find myself at a crossroads in life, I thought it might be relevant to share some highlights from this old page that really hit home with me. Most people write letters to their younger selves, talking about what they'd do differently now that they have gained perspective. In my case, it would have been more appropriate to have written a letter to my future self, reminding me of what I knew so long ago, but maybe would forget along the way.

The first line of my Candidate's Page:
At eleven I had a pretty good idea of what I wanted to be when I grew up.

Don't you think it is kind of  ironic that I chose When I Grow Up as the name of this blog?

The second line:
I started my own newspaper and called it the Charlotte Street Reporter. It sold for 10 cents and folded after two issues. Not exactly the New York Times but... (I was a writer way back when, and Charlotte is the name of the street my parents still live on).

At the very end, after listing all my accomplishments, internships and work history, I say this:

Since I've been at CMU I've learned a lot about myself and how to get along with others. I've learned to be independent and to make intelligent decisions. I've also learned that my biggest goal in life is not just to make a lot of money, it is to find a job that I can do my best at and be happy. I guess I was a pretty smart kid at eleven, I knew that the writing field was where I belonged.

Talk about knowing what is in your heart from a young age....makes me wonder if I had uncovered this Candidate's Page a few years back, maybe my own words would have sparked some immediate change of direction in my life. Maybe I would have started blogging sooner, started re-evaluating my happiness, and began to figure out where my true path leads.

As I watch my own children begin to choose their future paths, I'm relieved to learn that at 20 years of age a person can indeed know what is in their heart. As crazy as that may seem, you can know even then, what makes you the happiest. The trick is to stick with it, and not to settle. To keep on the path of  uncovering and discovering what makes you happy, even if ultimately that journey brings you right back to where it all started.

The good news:  it's never too late for any of us to get back on the right path. It might be difficult, even scary, and totally out of our comfort zones, but in the end what if it turns out to be the best thing you ever did? Wouldn't that make it all worth it? 

So "cheers" to my future self! To more writing, to rediscovering the passions in me, and to finding what makes me happy. The confidence, and optimism present in my words from 29 years ago is starting to bubble up to the surface. Watch out world, here I come again (or maybe finally).

Have you figured out your passion(s)? Please share them with me.

You Are What You Think, Not What You Think You Are

Ever heard of a vision board? Have you ever done one?

The key to living fulfilled is to find out what is important to you, to identify your passions and then to find a way to live with that passion in your life. The vision board experience is one way to help uncover and discover what is most important to you, and to help you visually express what you want in life. Think of it as a way to help unlock your dreams, goals and aspirations, even some that you might not have known about.

The idea behind a vision board is that you create a visual reminder of your dreams and goals. And it is based on the Law of Attraction which says: What you think... you will become, also what you put out into the Universe, will be returned to you.

A few months ago I attended a vision board workshop and created my own vision for the future. I loved the "me" time to sit back and think. In the past I have rarely allowed myself the time to consider questions like: What was I doing the last time I experienced joy? What could I see myself doing that would create more joy in my life? If money were not an issue, what would I spend my time doing?

Being a type A person, I am usually too busy getting things done to slow down and think about me. It's interesting what things you learn about yourself, your life, and your dreams for the future when you take the time to consider and reflect. 

Once you complete your Vision Board, it then serves as a visual representation/reminder of the things you want to have, be or do in your life.  Something you can refer back to when you're feeling a little off track, or lost, a visual personally created by you, that brings your dreams back into focus. 

Affirm the positive, visualize the positive and expect the positive, and your life will change accordingly.

In the past two months I have volunteered to lead a couple vision board workshops, one at Gilda's Club and one at a friend's house. Each time, not only do I enjoy making the connections with people and their stories, but I personally have come away with new things to add to my vision board.

I believe in the power of positive thinking. Do you? If you are interested in scheduling a vision board workshop, let me know. I'll even offer to lead one for free*, just for the experience!

*Certain restrictions apply of course.... send an email to terri.spaulding@sbcglobal.net if you are interested. 

How about you? Will you THINK positive in 2012?